OUT OF CONTROL?
I
Kings 17:8-16
Like the colors in the spectrum of light that combine to bring beauty and life to our lives and our worlds, so the spectrum of human personalities and behaviors enlivens and enriches our work,our learning and our relationships. From the introvert to the extrovert, the detailed-oriented planner to the ones, like Nike, just do it, to the big vision dreamer, all are needed. Like all things good, there is a down side when behaviors are taken to an extreme, affected by stress, our environment and our culture.
Take the widow of Zarephath. When a long term drought grips the region, she finds herself in a situation that is beyond her control. She fears for her life and the life of her only child, a son. With a sense of hopelessness, she tries to control what she can. Resigned to her fate, she makes a plan. She will gather some wood, use what little resources she has left to prepare a last meal for her son and herself, and die, and she is determined that neither god nor prophet is going to get in her way. She reacts with anger to Elijah's request to share what little she has left with him.
"She said, “I swear, as surely as your God lives, I don’t have so much as a biscuit. I have a handful of flour in a jar and a little oil in a bottle; you found me scratching together just enough firewood to make a last meal for my son and me. After we eat it, we’ll die.” (I Kings 17:12, MSG)
Control is about anxiety, the harmful extreme of fear. Sometime in our lives, we have experienced painful emotional, physical and spiritual wounding of some sort through circumstances that were beyond our control and made us feel helpless: abuse, traumatic injury, loss, betrayal of trust, failing to live up to unrealistic expectations. Control is a form of self protection where we put on inflexible body armor that protects us from ever being disappointed or disappointing anyone else. If we make our lives predictable with no surprises or risk of failure, we will never be hurt. Take no chances, live in an attitude of emotional tight-fistedness, and we will be safe.
"If you think you are in control, you are fooling yourself. As soon as you start listening, you realize you're not in control. And letting go will yield more and better results." (Charlene Li)
In reality, the more we try to control, the less control we actually have over what is happening in our lives, because what is really controlling us is our anxiety in fear,
In Jeremiah 29, the people of Israel, living as captives in Babylon, have been severely traumatized by the loss of family, homes and even their country. They are living in the midst of their enemies and living in fear of losing their identity and their culture. They try to control what is going on be pulling inward and focusing on the words of false prophets who fed their false hopes and maybe even raised the idea of rebelling against their captors.
Through the prophet, Jeremiah, God tells the Jews that he will release them, but it will be in seventy-five years. So, let go, let God and live life. Plant, marry, have children and grandchildren while they give their prayers and their service to the community in which they find themselves.
As Surely As God Livves
As surely as God lives, God knows. God always knows what is coming next for us, even though we don't. God knew that indeed the Jews would be released, but only according to his time table, not theirs.
God knew that when the widow was willing to step out in faith and follow Elijah's instructions, she and her son would be saved from starvation. While fear narrows our vision to only the possible dangers and impossibilities, faith opens our lives to the the good that God is working in our lives and to all the God possibilities of healing and blessing when we let go and let Christ's love guide our relationships, our decisions and even our giving of our time and resources.
The Widow of Zarephath discovered that the blessing of obeying God is that "no one has ever become poor by giving." (Anne Frank)
"Fear is the antithesis of faith, though living without fear is not easy. After all, how do we naturally choose to be unafraid of what we in fact fear?" Is that power within our conscious control? Only by a miracle are we set free of fear ... Indeed, true faith working within the heart is one of the greatest miracles of God." (from "Faith and Fear" by John Parsons, Hebrew for Christians,
http://www.hebrew4christians.com)
Is controlling every aspect of our life and of the lives of others along with the fear that motivates our actions preventing us to thrive as human beings and as Christians? Are controlling behaviors harming us and others as well as our relationship with God and our ability to give our life completely to Christ? To let go and let God? To fully share our time and our resources in service to others?
God loves us to much to leave us in a state of fear.
If the answer is yes, we can rely on this: God loves us to much to leave us in a state of fear. Fear is not of God, but love, power and a sound mind are. (2 Timothy 1:7) When we admit that our behaviors are harmful and that there are areas in our life in need of healing, God is generous God's love, forgiveness and healing.
When we begin a journey of healing, Christ walks with us, giving us strength and helping us bear the pain that comes with it. As we take this walk of faith, we will experience new freedom, a lifting of our burdens and a transformational experience of God's love.
Now, is the day to take the first step in that journey.
Jeremiah
29:1, 4-7
You are a control freak if you:
You are a control freak if you:
- "Help" other people drive - tell them what route to take, when to turn, where to park, remind them that the traffic light has changed.
- Devote a lot of attention and energy to keeping your personal environment organized.
- Give people a lot of "shoulds" and "oughts" - unsolicited advice, suggestions, and "constructive criticism."
- Have lots of personal rules, routines, rituals, and ceremonies.
- Arethe one who takes over and orders other people around when the situation seems confused.
- Dislike depending on others, accepting help from them, or allowing them to do things for you.
- Insist on "being right," having things done your way, or having the final word?
When these behaviors get in the way of living as the people God created us to be, what is to be done?
Like the colors in the spectrum of light that combine to bring beauty and life to our lives and our worlds, so the spectrum of human personalities and behaviors enlivens and enriches our work,our learning and our relationships. From the introvert to the extrovert, the detailed-oriented planner to the ones, like Nike, just do it, to the big vision dreamer, all are needed. Like all things good, there is a down side when behaviors are taken to an extreme, affected by stress, our environment and our culture.
Take the widow of Zarephath. When a long term drought grips the region, she finds herself in a situation that is beyond her control. She fears for her life and the life of her only child, a son. With a sense of hopelessness, she tries to control what she can. Resigned to her fate, she makes a plan. She will gather some wood, use what little resources she has left to prepare a last meal for her son and herself, and die, and she is determined that neither god nor prophet is going to get in her way. She reacts with anger to Elijah's request to share what little she has left with him.
"She said, “I swear, as surely as your God lives, I don’t have so much as a biscuit. I have a handful of flour in a jar and a little oil in a bottle; you found me scratching together just enough firewood to make a last meal for my son and me. After we eat it, we’ll die.” (I Kings 17:12, MSG)
Control is about anxiety, the harmful extreme of fear. Sometime in our lives, we have experienced painful emotional, physical and spiritual wounding of some sort through circumstances that were beyond our control and made us feel helpless: abuse, traumatic injury, loss, betrayal of trust, failing to live up to unrealistic expectations. Control is a form of self protection where we put on inflexible body armor that protects us from ever being disappointed or disappointing anyone else. If we make our lives predictable with no surprises or risk of failure, we will never be hurt. Take no chances, live in an attitude of emotional tight-fistedness, and we will be safe.
"If you think you are in control, you are fooling yourself. As soon as you start listening, you realize you're not in control. And letting go will yield more and better results." (Charlene Li)
In reality, the more we try to control, the less control we actually have over what is happening in our lives, because what is really controlling us is our anxiety in fear,
In Jeremiah 29, the people of Israel, living as captives in Babylon, have been severely traumatized by the loss of family, homes and even their country. They are living in the midst of their enemies and living in fear of losing their identity and their culture. They try to control what is going on be pulling inward and focusing on the words of false prophets who fed their false hopes and maybe even raised the idea of rebelling against their captors.
Through the prophet, Jeremiah, God tells the Jews that he will release them, but it will be in seventy-five years. So, let go, let God and live life. Plant, marry, have children and grandchildren while they give their prayers and their service to the community in which they find themselves.
As Surely As God Livves
As surely as God lives, God knows. God always knows what is coming next for us, even though we don't. God knew that indeed the Jews would be released, but only according to his time table, not theirs.
God knew that when the widow was willing to step out in faith and follow Elijah's instructions, she and her son would be saved from starvation. While fear narrows our vision to only the possible dangers and impossibilities, faith opens our lives to the the good that God is working in our lives and to all the God possibilities of healing and blessing when we let go and let Christ's love guide our relationships, our decisions and even our giving of our time and resources.
The Widow of Zarephath discovered that the blessing of obeying God is that "no one has ever become poor by giving." (Anne Frank)
"Fear is the antithesis of faith, though living without fear is not easy. After all, how do we naturally choose to be unafraid of what we in fact fear?" Is that power within our conscious control? Only by a miracle are we set free of fear ... Indeed, true faith working within the heart is one of the greatest miracles of God." (from "Faith and Fear" by John Parsons, Hebrew for Christians,
http://www.hebrew4christians.com)
Is controlling every aspect of our life and of the lives of others along with the fear that motivates our actions preventing us to thrive as human beings and as Christians? Are controlling behaviors harming us and others as well as our relationship with God and our ability to give our life completely to Christ? To let go and let God? To fully share our time and our resources in service to others?
God loves us to much to leave us in a state of fear.
If the answer is yes, we can rely on this: God loves us to much to leave us in a state of fear. Fear is not of God, but love, power and a sound mind are. (2 Timothy 1:7) When we admit that our behaviors are harmful and that there are areas in our life in need of healing, God is generous God's love, forgiveness and healing.
When we begin a journey of healing, Christ walks with us, giving us strength and helping us bear the pain that comes with it. As we take this walk of faith, we will experience new freedom, a lifting of our burdens and a transformational experience of God's love.
Now, is the day to take the first step in that journey.
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